Archive No.8: Amongst The Stars - The Imitations of Art

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These 10 years and 32 spears aimed at me
I sit in a chair and watch the world pass by me
A world I know even if I tried I couldn't be a part of 
The perpetuity of that pain makes me bleed onto my canvas

One day I will live amongst the stars  
I crave to leave you something I can look down upon
I've tried to earn the right to be a diamond in the sky
Knowing my life wasn't a regretful waste of time

It's paradoxical and I think about it all the time
A fabled mystery and a hope burning injury 
They said all I needed was a friend to help fight the demons in my head 
But I've been fencing with one hand tied behind my back

One day I will live amongst the stars 
But I fear it might not change what really ails my heart
I have made my peace with the stones that bludgeoned my raft 
And let me sink into the oceans I have tried to tame in the past

The irises that bloomed at my window
The sunflowers that ruined my table
The letters from my mother's other son lie unattended 
I gave away all the affection I should've shown myself

Paris promised a romantic afterlife 
And so I chased it with all of my might
The cobblestones and the busy harbor roars 
An eerie feeling knowing I won't belong

One day I will live amongst the stars
Roam these cornfields and feel bitter about the dark
One day I will find the will to be
As light as a feather and as heavy as a memory

And as Babylon willed it
I found peace in the wilderness
A short time I had to leave you with
My portraits, so you know I touched the surface. 


-auctor

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